3 days of Disneyland fun

 

Ahh Disneyland at Christmas time really makes it the happiest place on Earth! This year we ventured to Disneyland a week before Christmas with the whole Bewley family. I was a bit nervous about how big the crowds would be a week before Christmas but a little rain in the forecast did the trick.

We hit the road early Sunday morning and 6 hours later we were in Disneyland. The weather was beautiful and the lines were short! We went on Small World for our first ride. We had a great first day and stayed much later than I thought we would after our early morning travels.

 

Day two was the day to meet Santa! I brought my camera that day since it was predicted to rain on Tuesday. We got some great family photos. As much as I love my camera it is a bit of a pain at Disneyland. Seeing Santa was so much fun....well not at first for Caden but he warmed up to him. We wandered over to Innovation Studios to see what that was about. Oh I am so glad we went over there. There were Superheroes!! The boys (Mike and Bryon included) turned themselves into Ironman. Calvin was even brave enough to meet Captain America! Besides Santa that was the only character Calvin was willing to meet up close. Caden surprisingly was open to the idea of meeting characters if you held him. Caden met Jesse, Woody, Minnie, Jake and Captain America. Grandma Bewley wanted to see the fireworks show at Disneyland followed by the snow equaled a great way to end the night.

 

 

 

 

before- just fine sitting next to Santa

after- why is he putting his arm around me?!

 

Innovation Studios- Ironman

 



 

 

Day three- our last day at Disneyland was mixed with a few sprinkles. It was beautiful weather and the light rain only lasted a few minutes. The lines were short and the crowds were, well I don't even know if you could call it a crowd until later on in the day. While the big kids (yes everyone is a kid at Disneyland) went on Radiator Springs Racers, Caden and I went over to another ride in Carsland. There was one other family on the ride besides me and Caden. That as never happened before. The ride would end, the Disney employee would come around and check our seat belts and the ride would start again. We rode it  three times before anyone else joined! We saw the Aladdin show and didn't know how well the boys would like it, so we sat on the aisle so we could sneak out if need be. They loved the show and now Calvin puts on an Aladdin show for us at the house.We ended up going back to the Innovation Studios so we could show the rest of the family how much fun it was. We ended the night exhausted and eager for our next trip back to the happiest place on Earth!

 

Thanks for a fun trip Bewley Family!

 

a new kind of normal

Things will get back to normal, you can focus on your boys.... We heard it all the time when people found out K was leaving. Now that she is gone, my normal feels upside down and incomplete. I feel like I am missing someone all the time, my house is too quiet and I catch myself starting to walk into her room at night to check in on her. My chest tightens and I feel like I can't breathe when a memory sneaks up on me. And yes we chose this, not to adopt her, however, I did NOT give her up. She was never mine to begin with. God brought this precious girl into our lives for a short period and we were so honored to be part of her story. We fought hard for her and got her help she so desperately needed. So for my sanity and your better judgement, please do not say "I could never give up my child." There is so much pain and anger that arises when that is said, and it is said more than it should be. I think most people don't have a clue how painful those words are and the words probably aren't meant in that way but that is how they are perceived.

I know I don't owe anyone an explanation of why we chose not to adopt her. I feel like that is a question that people are wanting answers to but Bryon and I made a decision that was best for our K and our family. In the end that is what is most important. K's information is private and it is not for us to share.

But what I do want people to know is the love we have for her. I LOVE her to pieces, so much that a piece of my heart left with her that day we dropped her off at her forever home. Her happiness and joy for life could fool you if you didn't know her, but in the end she needed a family that didn't have little kids.

I have A LOT of guilt about not adopting K. I fear that she will think that I just left her. I know that it was the best decision for our family and K and that is what matters in the end. Her adoptive family is amazing to say the least and has been so supportive during this time. Her adoptive mom has sent encouraging texts and pictures of K. Seeing the familiar joy on her face leaves me knowing the best decision occurred in the end. K is doing awesome in her forever home. She has older siblings who are crazy about her and a mom who gets to stay at home with her. We couldn't be happier with her forever family. We know she is loved unconditionally and in a home who loves God. Our future will fall into place one day and we can't wait to see who God brings next. I don't know when that will happen so in the mean time we will be getting used to our new normal.